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Values and Purpose: Finding Meaning in Life

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The data is growing suggesting that finding meaning and value in life can be central to psychological wellbeing, says Dr. Michael Bordieri, Murray State University Assistant Professor of Psychology. He speaks with Kate Lochte on Sounds Good about the field's new focus from pathology to positives, the challenge clinicians have of going beyond happiness and how Viktor Frankl pioneered this method of psychological thought.

The central question is, Dr. Michael Bordieri says, what is a life lived well?

Is it a life where we're always happy? That's been the dominant model, he says. The idea that someone who doesn't have any symptoms of depression or negative thoughts and feelings is a life that we should all emulate is something that pervades our culture - Happiness as an ideal. But there's a movement coming suggesting that happiness isn't always "where it's at." The idea of chasing happiness and the perception of negative thoughts as a bad thing may be part of the reason why we're getting stopped in so many psychological problems to begin with.

What are some ways to measure a life lived well? One often thinks of contributions to society, says Kate Lochte. Dr. Bordieri adds that contributions can grand and profoundly world changing or much smaller and more personal, such as smiling at a stranger in a coffee shop. Change is tricky, but thinking small works. He suggests taking small steps to move forward and to encourage people to choose things they care about. We all want different things for different people to find their own paths in small, but meaningful, ways.

One of the biggest struggles Dr. Bordieri sees among students training to be clinicians is that happiness is so engrained in our culture as 'good.' He says new clinicians often want their clients to be happy and feeling good at the end of sessions, but he tells them that sometimes he looks for the opposite. There can be genuine moments you get when you take happiness off the table - opening up the opportunity for people to have conversations that are meaningful, like how they want to be as a parent and what that really means to them, which can be a painful but important conversation.

Dr. Bordieri asks his students how their conversation with clients are different than a conversation in any bar in the country? What can be offered that's different? One might be helping people see their lives, their suffering, the pain they carry in a different way. Values are not a new idea. This is something pioneered by Viktor Frankl in his writings on man's search for meaning. A Holocaust survivor, Frankl wrote about finding purpose in the most abysmal conditions possible. He had an opportunity to escape from the concentration camp, but instead chose to go back to care for individuals who were going to die from sickness or in the gas chamber. Finding freedom and meaning in that moment - that's the powerful story and the heart of which we talk about in values, Dr. Bordieri says, quoting Frankl: "Those who have a why to live can bear with almost any how."

"And I think it's that idea that when we have a why and a purpose and can connect in our life with what's important, the feeling good and happy doesn't have to always be there. That we can make room for discomfort, we can make room for unpleasant emotions because those come with us along the journey to the place where we really want to go."

Dr. Bordieri invites you to think about what could that 'why' be in your own life and how you can find ways to go out live that.

Dr. Micahel Bordieri is an Assistant Professor of Psychology at Murray State University and a clinical supervisor at the MSU Psychological Center. The Psychological Center is staffed by graduate student sin clinical psychology at MSU who provide therapy and assessment services under the supervision of licensed clinical psychologists. The center is open to MSU students, faculty and staff as well as community members from the surrounding area. The Center's number is 270-809-2504.

Our next discussion with Dr. Bordieri will be April 7.

Matt Markgraf joined the WKMS team as a student in January 2007. He's served in a variety of roles over the years: as News Director March 2016-September 2019 and previously as the New Media & Promotions Coordinator beginning in 2011. Prior to that, he was a graduate and undergraduate assistant. He is currently the host of the international music show Imported on Sunday nights at 10 p.m.
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